My Christmas Story of 2015

 

It seems that every year around Christmas time something pretty big happens in my life to challenge me in my faith.  I have it all figured out and then something happens to change all of that.  That happened again this year.  At the beginning of December, I lost my job.  The reason behind it, from what I was told, was a stupid one.  At least I think so, and so does most others that know.  But anyway, one day I’m an assistant general manager of a hotel and the next day without a job.  As a single mom and Christmas coming and finances already challenging, this was a shock and changed all of the plans that I had made.  The very day that I lost my job, my daughter and I had planned to decorate for Christmas.  I wasn’t in the “Christmas spirit” too much, and the thought of it just made me wanna cry. But she decorated anyway with her boyfriend while I was thinking of how this ruined my plans.  I had plans to volunteer time and  to help a lot more this year.  I felt that I was finally, kind of in a place to do that more.  Yet, after hearing the news that changed everything I was sitting on my patio in shock, helpless, no energy, drained, confused and scared.  “What am I going to do?” was the thought that kept screaming at me.  Sure, I had been reading my bible almost every day and I pray and I was praying in that moment.  I know God’s promises to take care of me.  I’ve experienced His faithfulness time and time again.  So, why was I so scared?  Because, I like to have a plan and I like for things to go smoothly so that I can complete what I feel like I need to.  Or let’s be honest, so that I can complete all that I want to.  I’m not exactly sure why everything happens the way that it does, but God’s plan is perfect.  So much more happened after I lost my job.  I prayed and I updated my resume, started applying for jobs, going to interviews, even trying a few that were commission only, that didn’t work out.  I put forth so much effort, and kept praying for God to open the right door and close the wrong ones.  Well, I guess I just kept going to the wrong door, in fact, I’m still searching.  God promised to provide for me as long as I listened to Him and did what He asked me to.  I did that to the best of my ability, with a bit of complaining at times, but in prayer to see God in it all.  Looking back over the month of December I grew closer to the heart of God.  I learned what it was like to trust Him, to hear Him, to feel His presence with me each step of the way.  And I also know what it feels like to have an enemy right behind me, throwing things at me, in front of me, screaming all of these horrible lies to distract me from hearing God’s sweet, gentle voice.  The enemy, as I learned, is no match for me.  Jesus has my heart and He has given everything that I need to defeat the enemies in my life.  Some days were very emotional, scary and quite challenging, but God always found a way to make my heart smile.  I was surrounded by my loving church family, my family, and friends, old co-workers too,  who stepped in and helped in many tangible ways, but even did this in a way that touched my heart so deeply.  God knows exactly what my heart desires and I’ve learned that as long as I keep Him first, I can see through the eyes of my heart and experience all that is surrounding me.  This blog could be a novel if I wrote, in detail, all of the sweet, sweet things that were done for me during my Christmas month, in fact, that is what I intended for this blog to be.  However, as my heart began to tell the story, it took a different route.  God’s blessings always exceed any that I could dream up and I am a huge dreamer and have a huge imagination.   Just to give you a small glimpse, I was given money, bills were paid for us, a ham was delivered to my door along with flowers, a small Christmas tree was given with ornaments of gift certificates, and so many prayers and encouraging phone calls, texts, and emails were sent.  Every time I turned around I was blessed!!  I also had both of my daughters home for Christmas, which was the best gift of all and what I had been praying for.  God answers all of my prayers and He has a plan for me.  I still don’t know exactly where I am going and I know that I have to do my part, but I trust in Him to lead me and I know that it may get tough, but will be worth every moment.  Christmas this year was a lesson about life.  Jesus was born so that we could truly see through a different set of eyes.  I’ve learned that in order to experience true life, that I must be willing to sacrifice my plan and follow Him, and then we take the journey together.

 

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